A Good Week

Yeah, I procrastinate a lot. 'Know why? Mainly because I've got other things to do that I'm more concerned about and that mean more to me. Plus, I refuse to allow anything that I see as inconsequential to rule me. I mean, seriously... most things I do, I could just as easily not do and never miss. Most of what I'm doing even now is only being done as requirement by someone else. Such is life...

Once again, ya boy is swamped. But it's okay; you see, for the first time, I can see an end to the nonsense and the jumping through hoops. Got the good news yesterday: I'm 3 classes from graduation. Praise the Lord.

However, that's assuming I pass all my classes THIS semester. And to do that, I need to jump at this 20-page paper due tomorrow at midnight. Reportedly, there's a thunderstorm pending for tomorrow evening/Sunday morning, so I need to get a move-on so that I'm not defeated by my own brontophobia. Yeah... I still haven't beaten that yet.

Seriously though, I'm a little tuckered at the moment. Not exactly sleepy, but I can tell that my body is taxed. I'm involved in doing so many things at another's command, but when I'm not doing that, I'm trying to slip little bits of me and my agenda into... my life. How ironic.

(Sigh...) It's been a good week, folks. I don't mind the grind, as long as I'm a little closer at the end of the day. I had to cut a few corners, but I managed to insert some time for my personal agenda in the midst of the madness. And, thanx to a few random acts of God's grace, I was able to do more than I had even planned on.

Maybe... I've earned a night's rest. The question is, if I go to sleep now, will I wake up in time for this church meeting tomorrow; will I have enough time to finish my paper by midnight tomorrow; will I have enough energy to get back up on Sunday to conduct Youth Sunday; will I have to try to choke down my phobia to pull it all off, something I've never been successful in doing...

And don't get it twisted kids, that's not even half of what I hafta do in the coming days; even in the midst of it all, I hafta find the time and energy to wash my car before my dad gets petty and decides to take it from me or something... as if dirt on a car will at all affect my progress in life.

A young lady asked me what I was thinking about in class the other day; as you can see, there's a reason I usually answer that question with "nothing". I could be here all day telling you what's on my mind. I have things on my mind that don't even make good sense. Because we don't live in a world that makes good sense.

I should be writing my paper right now, but my concentration's no good at the moment. Yeah, I know everybody's got their problems; what's that got to do with me? What in the world in my life has any semblance to the things going on in the lives of those around me? I mean, that's one of the reasons it's so hard for me to find help in completing tasks; I'm an oddball who does and thinks about things that the average person in my vicinity doesn't take the time to do or consider.

For instance, right now I'm thinking...

SUPERTANGENT!!!!!

I would like to pack some things and walk out my front door right now. And when I get outside, I'd like for a huge, mystical train to come out of dark nothingness and park in front of my porch. I'd like to throw my suitcase over my shoulder and board the train; and from the moment I set foot on the train, I'd like time to stop cold.

Upon entering the train, I want to see nothing but familiar faces. Not exactly friends, just people that simply know where I'm coming from; if that includes my friends, then cool. All I want is people that I can make eye contact with and nod my head at, and they already know what's up. People of the same mind as me.

I find a spot in the back of this amazing train and grab an empty seat. As I sit, I glance across the aisle and meet eyes with something lovely; a stranger, but someone who knows me. And she asks if she can sit with me.

I invite her, sliding over to the window to make room and chucking my baggage into the seat she previously occupied. The train begins to pull off as she tumbles into the seat with me. It eases down the street, approaching the houses at the end of the court. But, once at the end of the street, it passes through the houses as if they were part of another world.

We gain speed quickly, and as we do the stranger leans against me in amazement. I place my arm around her as she smiles, and the train rises into the night sky. Where are we headed? No one cares, not even the driver; time has stopped and the world is ours. We pass over busy cities and quiet countrysides in eternal moments of rapture. Sparks fly from beneath the train as the wheels grind on some invisible, intangible rails that guide us higher and higher. And we find ourselves gliding into outer space, bending corners around planets and kissing the outskirts of the stars.

Eventually, my companion and I fall asleep. Nothing more than two cuddling passengers on a train to who-knows-where. And who cares what happens after that...

Random, yes. But that's how I feel right now. Funny thing is, this is me after a GOOD week. Possibly the BEST week I've had in a long time, actually. But I'm dog-tired and far from finished.

Coulda been writing my paper right now, I know; I just had too much on my mind. It's going on midnight; I don't think I'm gonna be up for very much longer. From the time I wake up tomorrow until... probably the end of next week, actually... it's gonna be a nonstop grind to the finish, once again. Looking forward to it.

Any week you can walk away from is a good one. B-J