What Am I Doing HERE?...

(A philosophy of the now; you might need to put your thinking caps on...)

"The Future is in the Past." It's not so complicated a thought; at least, I won't make it complicated... this time. This is what I mean in a nutshell: mankind is in a state of social and cultural decline, to the point that we need to revisit our past before we can move forward. You might not agree with me, but that's just how I feel.

I don't blame you if you think I'm obsolete, old-fashioned, outdated. Even I stood here in my own house the other day and just thought to myself, "What am I doing HERE?" In other words, what am I doing in 2006? Seems like a funny question, but you gotta realize two things about me: 1) I'm stuck in the past; 2) I'm ahead of my time. (My apologies if it sounds like I'm bragging on that second point; being "ahead of my time" is not as glamourous as you may think. I'll explain later...)

Let's see... I need illustrations...

When I say I'm stuck in the past, I'm the cat that listens to mainly old school music. But I don't just listen to it, I PREFER it. Like, as a whole, new school can't mess with old school at all... period.

You know how all the fellas are sprung over Beyonce, Mya, Monica, Megan Goode, and such? Not me. I like my Lisa Fischers, my Dorothy Dandridges, my Cree Summers, my Shanices, my Pam Griers, and my Rosalind Cashes. My (relatively) conservatively-dressed, intellectually stimulating, stunningly beautiful, multi-talented lost diamonds, feel me?

And with the gas prices off the chain, I'm wondering why we haven't gone "back to the future" with playas rollerskatin to work. I mean, why not? We've got such an obesity problem in America right? 'Seems like a simple reversion to old school tactics would fix that right up. Try bouncin', rockin', rollin', and skatin' to work every day and not losing weight...

To "cap" it all off, I'm working on the super-powered king Afro; my mom always said I was a kickback from the 60's. Well, kickback the 60's and you get all-natural for the '06 (did you catch that? ...it's all in the wrist).


Now... The "ahead of my time" line simply means that I think outside the box--- WAY outside the box. You might even call me a dreamer, with the exception of one thing: nothing is impossible with me. I don't dream, I have vision; I intend to make things happen. I hear my fellow Christians say "I can do all things through Christ, which strengthens me", but then they back down from new challenges and roads less-taken. But I believe the Word 100%; therefore, my mentality is, if I have an idea, it can be done. I will make people put their money where their mouth is.

I don't believe in repeating mistakes; I have trouble with some older people because of that. For instance, if we have a discussion and come to a conclusion that an old way is not right or in need of change, then my next move is to either withdraw from the contraption or to change the situation. History isn't taught to be repeated. My time, the present time, is a time of trouble; I think "ahead of my time" to see our way to solutions and better days. Get it?

I walk through Augusta and I see the common buildings, and I say to myself, "there needs to be color here; this building needs to get higher; why are these all squares when there could be curves..." I make music, and I ask myself, "if my music sounds like what's already out there, then what's the point of making it?" If it's not fresh, it's not gonna come from me, in word or melody. It's not arrogance, it's simply progress; I don't see the point in doing what's already been done, unless you just like stagnation and repetition. To each his own.


But, as I stated earlier, I came to a place the other day where I found myself asking, "What am I doing HERE? If half of me is stuck in the past and the other half is ahead of my time, then why am I here, in the now of 2006?" The question itself just sounded sweet to me to be honest; sometimes I just love the fact that I don't have a place anywhere. But here, I realized that I DO have a place somewhere.

I thought about it: if not "now", then where else would I be? In the past, where my future ideals would be wasted? In the future, where I'd be uprooted and without foundation? It's the combination of foresight and hindsight that make me an effective agent for change RIGHT NOW. And then it hit me that the "now" is simply the end of the past that has been and the beginning of the future that is still to come. I'm in the perfect place that I need to be; one foot in the past and one foot in the future places me smack into the now.

So perhaps... perhaps many people are in the opposite of the now: the never. When the people are disconnected from their past and their future is shrouded in apathy and hopelessness, that must be the "never". I know it's a lot of philosophical rhetoric, but this makes sense to me; we hafta live in the now, one foot in the past, one foot in the future. HERE is where we are meant to be; it may seem obvious to you, but I bet you never actually THOUGHT about it did you? PAY ATTENTION, lol...

It Here and Now or Never... B-J